Life is too short to eat fat-free cheese
Friday, June 29, 2007
With the #6 pick in the NBA draft, the Bucks select...
In one of the more surprising moves in the Bucks and NBA history, the Bucks took Chinese PF/C Yi Jianlian (pronounced EE TEE-an-LEE-an).
Now, it has come out that Yi's agent (Dan Fegan) came right out and told the Bucks prior to the draft that Yi would not play in Milwaukee. They were so serious about this that they barred the Bucks from coming to any workouts Yi had in the states and would not allow him to have an individual workout with them.
Bucks GM Lenny Harris saw 2 things:
1 - Yi is a big time talent that could really help the Bucks.
2 - The Bucks would have an "in" into China's marketing base, population 1.5 billion. Can you say "Cha-Ching"?
Harris decided that the team needed him and the Bucks could not pass up this opportunity. Now the rumor is that Fegan is going to formally request that the Bucks trade Yi. To this I agree with how Ty over at Bucks Diary feels:
If I were Larry Harris I would absolutely and categorically refuse such a request on the spot. Harris was right to defy their original efforts to avoid a selection by the Bucks, and having done that, it is imperative now that he sticks to his guns. Giving in to the ridiculous demand at this point would do nothing but harm the Bucks and set a dangerous precedent that, once established, would damage the future interests of small market teams like Milwaukee.
Harris' message to Yi's representatives should be direct and simple: If Yi wants to play in the NBA, he must do so in Milwaukee. End of discussion. The sooner he gets that through his skull, the better for him. A protracted holdout, or a return to China, would be a seriously foolish move, as it would only serve to hurt his pocketbook and his marketability. It would cost him NBA paychecks he can never recover, and it would damage his public reputation and squander away the precious goodwill his representatives hope to cash in on through their various endorsement schemes. He has no rational choice but to play for the Bucks.
Sorry Yi, you enter the draft and take your chances on where you are picked. That's the nature of all sports in the US and you have to live with it. Now, after you're done with your Chinese team duties in Vegas and such, get your ass to Milwaukee and see for yourself how it is. You may want to stop by Summerfest. That will change your trade demands real quick.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
A moment of silence
In case you have not heard, the founder of Johnsonville Brats, Ralph Stayer, has passed on. From the AP article:
Stayer's butcher shop was struggling in 1945, when he went to a picnic and saw garbage cans filled with partially eaten brats. He and his wife drew upon their Austrian and Slovenian heritage to make better-tasting bratwurst based on an old family recipe, his son said.
Stayer once said he knew the company was doing something right when a customer who had previously ordered 5 pounds of bratwurst and 30 pounds of hamburger returned six months later and ordered 30 pounds of bratwurst and 5 pounds of hamburger.
For centuries, mankind has yearned for that perfect food, that ambrosia to make their life worthwhile. Ancient Sumerians went on discovery treks for months on end to locate it, Rome tried to conquer the known world in search of it, Columbus dared sail to the edge of the world to find it. Ralph Stayer discovered it, and the world would never be the same.
Now the masses had the perfect food and world peace was that much closer to reality. Summertime picnics have become that much more enjoyable as friends and family come together knowing that with Johnsonville brats, the outing will be a joyous one. Professional sports attendence has gone up by over 100,000% since Johnsonville brats came out as tailgating has become the national pastime.
What a debt we owe to Mr. Stayer, and to show how much we appreciate his creation and to honor his legacy, we should all grill some of his delicious creations. So raise your Johnsonville brats in a toast to Ralph Stayer all you cheeseheads and say thanks to our hero.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
The Brewers sweep the Giants and have now gone 7-1 in their last 8 games. They have a 7.5 game lead over the Cardinals and are 10 games over .500. Attendance is nearing the level it was when the stadium first opened (currently at about a 2.7M pace Whoo Hoo!). The hitters have gained their confidence back and the pitching staff is doing a fine job as well.
Things are real good right now. Let's keep it up Crew!
Monday, June 18, 2007
The phenom has arrived
What a fun weekend. I got to go to both Friday and Saturday night's games of the Brewers and the Twins at the Metrodome. Nothing better than being around the opposing teams place, surrounded by their taunting fans and having your team just crush them.
Best part, there was a large group of Brewers fans who kept starting "Let's go Brewers!" over and over. The local hicks kept trying to boo them out, but they failed. The chants only got louder and louder as the game went on, but the boos had less and less heart behind them. For two days, the Brewer fans took over the Metrodome.
For a breaking news story: Joe Mauer is back on the 15 day DL. Apparently he was doing a complex Word Find and has a brain strain. What a wuss.
I also had a fine personal weekend as well. In addition to the aforementioned games, I went to a big family picnic (wife's side) at Minnehaha Falls. Great day outside with loads of fun people. Even my buddy Murph showed up as he and the family were up doing some other family business. Father's Day itself was a good day. Found out that my gift was a black leather recliner. OOOOOOOOOO! Top it off with a steak dinner and life is good.
But enough about that, the time has come. Tonight features the debut of a pitcher that has not had as much hype and expectation since Ben Sheets arrived. The man has posted legendary minor league stats: This year he has a 2.90 ERA and has struck out 110 batters in 77 2/3 innings. His name is ¡Gallardo! There are several individuals who are larger than life and can pull off the single name: Zorro, Godzilla, Prince. ¡Gallardo! is such an individual.
So cower in fear San Francisco Giants. You shall be the first to witness the destructive power of ¡Gallardo!
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Rules for dating my daughter
1. You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes off my daughter’s body, I will remove them from your head.
2. I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Do not take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear hanging out and your pants ten sizes too big and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes, do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your hips, buttocks and legs.
3. Convention dictates that in order to us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back in my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early”.
4. I have no doubt that you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This if fine with me as long as it is OK with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry- I will make you cry.
5. If you stand here in my front hallway waiting for my daughter to appear and more than an hour goes by, do not sit and fidget. If you want to be on time for a movie- you should not be dating. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
6. The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: places where there are no parents, policemen or clergy within eyesight: places where there is darkness; places where there is dancing, holding hands or happiness; places where the ambient temperature is warm enough that it is not necessary for my daughters clothing to cover every inch of her body from her chin down. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual them are to be avoided- no exceptions. Movies with a “G” rating are okay, hockey games are okay (that “covered from the chin down thing”). Visiting old folk’s homes or attending the church skating party are better.
7. Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a middle aged dimwitted has-been, but on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless ruler of your world. If I ask where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel and five wooded acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.
8. Be afraid. Be very afraid. I will have my weapon cleaned, locked and loaded as I wait in the darkness for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Shout the perimeter password, announce in a clear and loud voice that you have brought my daughter home safely- and early- and then return to your car. There is no reason for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine… and the little red dot on your forehead will go away as soon as you do.
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